"NAMES"
Jane Lecroy

Edited & laid out by by Amy Meese and Mark Wagner

Published by Booklyn © 2007

$15

HAUNTED
Once I was not haunted
once I was excited to wake up in the morning
once a day seemed like a long time
once I didn’t feel responsible for everything that was going wrong
once I wasn’t constantly thinking
once it was quiet for me sometimes

Nothing was easier then
Life wasn’t more beautiful

These minutes are awesome
the smiles on my children’s faces
the words in their mouths blooming understanding and confusion
I am blessed, radiant, swooning
I feel crowded by the beauty
worried by the brevity of everything
everything is just slipping by: them, you, this, me
dissipating, evaporating, vanishing

Now there are ghosts all around me
repeating their stories over and over
dread and caution cling to my actions
alongside gratefulness there is loathing
relativity is a curse
my mind a constant concert of dialogues, arguments, comedies
I am laughing

this hour is a million years
this hour is a wink

Each day is as crazy as a dream
living makes me tired
I’m on fire
It is no mystery
there is much more darkness than light
It is all mystery
anything is possible
coalescing, accumulating, arriving
we are
materializing

Are you still in love?
I am still in love
with the last thing,
the new thing, the next thing
You!

We are ghosts
I’ve said this all before
in your ear
before I disappeared
the same way I got here, just now
come to me again
let us go
let us go