Violence to Women?
Posted By Jane on November 7, 2001
Q. Pretty much every woman I know has been sexually assaulted, molested, raped, domestically abused, and lots of other fucked up stuff. Every morning on the subway I see pictures of women pictured as weak, scantily clad, quiet, submissive and crazy tools with which to sell product. Every day I think about going to court and experiencing such a vile, sexist, racist and classist system first hand fucking me over because I was not a survivor of the rape outlined by the dominant discourse of rape, but by a much more common form of rape by an acquaintance. Then I get out of the subway and men suggest that they should have sex with me, and top it all off by reminding me I am a Chink or a “Vietnam Bitch.” So Jane, what do we do? How will things get better? How will you protect Alice Luna?
- Ayen Tran
A. Your question is a good one and I have been thinking of the answer for a long time and I’m sure through my daughter’s life I will be working on answering that question. Violence towards women is a challenge I deal with in my own life, like all women. How do we protect ourselves? How can I protect my daughter? I have to teach her to protect herself. I have to fill her with self-confidence and give her a critical eye with which to view society and especially advertising. I will teach her to set her own boundaries and believe in them. I will teach her to make her desire the priority. I will provide an environment that offers experiences that will make her love her body and respect her life. I will be an example to her. I will be strong and I will raise her in a community of strong women. I will take her to see amazing things that women do. I will make a big deal celebration out of her first menstruation, we will witness births and death together and have a real dialog about these things, I will take her to the Michigan’s Women’s Music Festival, I will encourage her to celebrate and strengthen her body through physical discipline like karate, dance, yoga or gymnastics. I will fill her life with excellent examples of great people, women and men. I will encourage her to demand high standards when it comes to choosing friends. I will not protect her from reality. I will show her how beautiful the world is and also how terrifying. I will alert her to the dangers and give her tools with which to live bravely. I will provide a strong family where she can always be herself and I will love her. I will love her and I will love her. I am also opening this question up to others. How do we protect women?
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